Well, as usual, it’s been wayyyy longer than I ever planned
since I’ve updated my blog! But here we are, 5 weeks later. So much has
happened, but I am just going to share a few thoughts and reflections that I’ve
experienced and been living during these times:
Sometimes, we just don’t really feel like God is there. We
don’t feel His presence, we don’t feel like praying, there’s no real passion in
trying to live out His commands. In those times, we have to ask ourselves: Is
my faith a mere passing whim? Is it a sentiment? A feeling that may come and go
like the wind? Or is it something deeper? I don’t want my faith to be an
emotion. In times of difficulty or dryness, I need to choose Jesus, deeper than
thoughts and feelings; deeper and more profound than my passing emotions. I am
convicted of His life and His presence. Therefore, I choose to live from this
conviction, rather than by what I feel.
Our community went on a weekend retreat to a beautiful
waterfall nearby. My prayer was: “Thank you Lord for this beautiful nature,
which screams to us of Your existence!” But I don’t want to just see God in
something so amazing like as a waterfall. I want to see Him in everything! God,
open our eyes to the immense wonder and mystery of a flower, a sunset, a bird,
and most of all, of each and every human being.
We’re so stressed all the time! Why is that? Because we have
a million and one things in our brain since the second we wake up in the
morning. What is the most common thing to do the minute we wake up? Worry. Worry
about what we have to do, where we have to go, how we’re going to get
everything done. I don’t want to live in worry! So, I’m going to try not to
think of a million things at once; I will do things one at a time. I will do it
purposefully, and when I’m done, I will get up to continue my day. God is in
the present moment, so let’s stop worry about and living in the future!
I’ve sinned. I have 2 options. I can be ashamed, run away
from God, feel unworthy to be in His presence; or, I can have faith and trust
in God’s infinite Mercy, recognize my own smallness and compete inability to do
anything good without His grace, not be surprised at my fall (since I am so
weak), and like a child, simply ask God’s forgiveness, return to His fold, and
adore Jesus.
We recently put on a retreat for teens here in Comayagua. How
is it possible that 150 teenagers, some rich, some poor, some from the
mountains, some from the city, some faithful believers, others lost and in
search of something more – can come together in one room, before a supposed “piece
of bread” (the Eucharist), and be so deeply affected so as to weep?
And
this is no isolated experience! I’ve seen the same thing in the Bronx, in
Pittsburgh, Rome, and countless other places. What has that kind of power, when
it seems like almost nothing can deeply affect young people today? What has the
power to make teens sit or kneel in peaceful silence for 2 hours, without cell
phones or ipads? Or better put, WHO has that power?
The
power comes from this fact: We’re all, each and every one of us, rich or poor,
man or woman, old or young – all of us are seeking for a deep, meaningful,
lasting happiness and peace. The world tells us incessantly that the path to
this happiness is simple: do whatever you want! This is freedom! This is
happiness! We hear this voice from the world each day. It’s a voice that’s loud
and flashy, attractive and exciting. And within ourselves, there is a part of
us which tells us, “Yes! It’s true!”
We
have another part of us, deeper down and harder to hear, which tells us, “No.
There’s something more.” This voice, the very Voice of God, is quiet and
peaceful. It doesn’t fight with the noise of the world, but is always there,
waiting for us to listen. And it’s HARD to listen. It takes real effort, real
work. We have to separate ourselves from the noise – external, but mostly
internal noise. We have to calm ourselves, and ask God to help us hear this
voice that speaks in our depth. It is this voice, God Himself, Who can bring
150 teens to their knees in silence. Because this voice is something real. It’s
not something flashy or superficial or short-lived. It counts from something
real. It shows us who we REALLY are, underneath all the masks – why we’re here;
where we come from; where we’re going.
Jesus
told the Apostles to go and make disciples of all nations, of all the world.
Look inside yourself – there are worlds within our own heart that have yet to
hear the Good News, or at least to believe them! How many wounds or grudges or
fears exist within us that just can’t accept the fact that they are loved by
God and can be healed; that He YEARNS to heal them? Let us seek out the still,
small voice of God that speaks to our very core, and let us give Him those
parts within us which so need His healing and peace.
“May the Lord of peace Himself give you peace at all times
and in every way.” – 2 Thessalonians 3:16
Que Dios le bendiga! Hasta pronto!
Eric
